The universe is out to get me....

It all started on Monday...

• rearview mirror fell off car
• 99% sure I got a flashed speeding
• went to buy a car only to find someone bought it 2 minutes prior
• Booked accommodation for BDO and PAID! only to be told they don't actually have accommodation
• The people I booked accommodation through had to find us accommodation we've gone from a luxury apartment to a one bedroom hotel room
• The restaurant my sister works at will most likely be closing on Monday and 15+ staff will be out of work
• There is a car in the paper I want to buy and they won't answer their phone

 Please universe let me find a car by Monday and let my sisters job be secure

How can someone See me when I cannot See myself

This is something that I have been struggling with for I do not care to remember how long...I seem to suffer from a form of social anxiety which seems to stop me from being able to be myself....it's quite strange actually...I've been psycho analysing myself I have come to the conclusion that there is no single trigger it seems that some how my mind decides whether someone is a "threat" or not and my reactions come from there...also if I work myself up by over thinking something I freak out....I'm sure I haven't always been like this but maybe I have....and I need help, I think it has something to do with thinking people are constantly judging me which I know they're not...argh! See I tend to not tell people things like this....no one knows I am and have been struggling with this for years because I think there reation will be bad or they will think I'm being silly..which is INSANE I know this but I can't get past it. I get the whole sweaty palms, racing heart, not being able to think and general mind freak out....I have decided I should definitely go to the doctor and see what they can do for me...quite funny considering I have been thinking that I should go to the doctor for years and get help but then I think that they won't believe me and I will walk out empty handed and ten steps backwards...I just need to pick up the phone and make a appointment which is something I used to struggle with making phone calls which I now do many many times a day so why can't I make this call????
I think just writing this has given me a chance to breathe...

unhappy news

I received a email on Friday that the Make-Up school I was planning on doing a diploma at next year is closing up :( so now I don't know what I am going to do as they focused on a lot of special effects stuff more so than fashion make-up which is what I want to do....so looks like I will be looking for somewhere just as good. Melbourne might just be on the radar

bruised...

a quick play with my new bruise wheel

 

Ben Nye......Love!!

I bought a few Ben Nye products from the U S of A oh about 2 months ago but to cut a long story short they finally arrived yesterday....yew! The excitement is just enthralling...and I cannot wait to start testing them out.

Some of the products I'm super duper excited about playing with are 

Ben Nye Death Wheel

Ben Nye Bruise Wheel

Ben Nye Stage Blood mmm peppermint tastes pretty good too

 

Halloween

Crazy times, awesome fun, a lot of time lost and some uber cool costumes...